WHY THE RAMONA AND BEEZUS MOVIE MEANS SO MUCH TO ME

I recently rewatched the movie Ramona and Beezus for about the millionth time, and was reminded of just how much I love it. I think it's one of the most rewatchable movies I've ever seen. 

In case you've never seen it... based on the Beezus and Ramona books by Beverly Cleary, it's about 9-year-old Ramona Quimby, who tries her best to help her family and be herself but always seems to get into trouble. Her older sister Beezus (the nickname accidentally given to Beatrice when Ramona was a baby) doesn't always help much either- of course she and Ramona love each other, but it seems Ramona's always getting on Beezus's nerves.

Even though this movie seems like just a cutesy, feel-good family film... it means so much more than that to me. And today I want to talk about why I love it so much. 

First of all, it's about family. It highlights the cozy, special times that families have together, and takes me back to my childhood. I love being at home, and this movie embodies that safe, beautiful feeling of being in the four walls of your home making memories with people you love. (And the Quimby family is ridiculously likeable- I absolutely love every member, and of course Aunt Bea and Uncle Hobart. You couldn't have asked for a better cast.)

also Ginnifer Goodwin looks sooo pretty in this movie

Have you ever gotten that feeling when something happens that's really simple, but for some reason, so very beautiful and special? And you long to experience it again the next time there's a chance, but there's just no planning these moments. They fall into place and you don't know when they'll come again. Maybe I'm the only one who really takes note of these things... but it's one of my favorite things ever. Like... when it snows and you're watching movies with your sisters and maybe you've done it a million times before, but for whatever reason this time there was just this feeling that you wish you could capture and hold onto forever. I don't know if this makes sense at all, because I can't really put it into words. 

But to me, that's what this whole movie feels like. From Ramona and Howie playing in the hole in her house, to Ramona drawing the biggest picture in the world with her dad while home sick from school, to Ramona and Beezus arguing at home alone until something happens that brings them together and makes them stop fighting. It's just like a chain of those moments that are so bittersweet, you wish you could relive them, because you feel like you might not ever get that feeling again. 

I was a teenager when I first watched it, but after a while I realized just how much I related to Ramona. As the youngest child, I often felt the same way she did. (she does have a baby sister in the movie, but she clearly hasn't been around very long, and Ramona still seems very much the youngest child.) She honestly reminds me so much of how I was when I was a kid.

She has big ideas that don't work out. Her fashion sense is similar to how I would have dressed at that age. (and hers is honestly better- one time my mom let me leave the house in a red turtleneck, a yellow vest, and a black bejewelled sock cap. I still can't get over how horrendous I didn't realize I looked.) She tries to do grown-up things and help out but is stopped by her big sister and others telling her that she can't. 

Honestly? I'm having a hard time putting how much this movie means into words, because I guess it's hard putting your feelings into words. There were a whole lot of times as a kid when I felt lonely and unneeded, just like Ramona did. My siblings were all so much older than me that I had trouble relating to them, and it seemed they never wanted to do the things I wanted to do. I couldn't seem to grow up fast enough, because then maybe I'd be seen and fit in with the rest of my family. 

One scene in particular really hits hard- when Ramona falls through the attic floor and causes a big scene in the middle of her family's open house. Her dad tells her, "It's time to grow up!" and she says, "Can't you see I'm trying?!" To which her dad responds, "You need to try harder!" 

Now, her dad is fantastic and he obviously didn't mean to hurt her. But words like that do hurt. I've been there. My whole life, it seems. Being the youngest, and having most of the important people in your life in different seasons than you, is hard, and I think sometimes people in those situations are treated a little unfairly. 

At the end there's a scene where Ramona decides she's going to run away. (has every kid has this thought at least once in their lives? I know I did, though I never in a million years would have had the guts to do it. xD) Her mom walks in on her packing her suitcase and decides to help her out, then puts a scarf on her, makes her promise to write, and sends her out the door all alone. Ramona then walks down her street crying, a poignant Taylor Swift song starts playing, and my heart breaks for this poor little girl. 

Long story short  (spoiler alert, if you haven't seen it), she ends up at the bus station realizing that her mom packed her suitcase with heavy items so she wouldn't be able to go very far, and her family is right behind her in the car. The following reunion is possibly one of the most heartwarming movie scenes I've ever watched. The family share a hug and Mrs. Quimby says "I'd be just lost without my Ramona." 

And Ramona realizes just how much she's loved and needed by her family. Something every child should be assured of. 

I don't really know what else I can say. But this movie is just SUCH  beautiful, relatable representation of what it's like to be a kid, and be frustrated, and try your hardest only for things to go wrong. It's a soft, homey movie that reminds you how special it is to be little and make carefree memories with your family, and makes you want to go back to those days. It shows that kids can be unhappy even when their life and family seem perfect, and that everyone needs to be reminded that they're loved and given a bit of extra affection now and then. 

I wish I could say exactly how this movie makes me feel, but I suppose that's why it's so special to me- it just strikes something deep within me that I can't explain, and perhaps nobody else feels quite the same way. But this movie will forever be one of my favorite comfort movies- perhaps my favorite, as I've watched it time and time again- and I love it so much. < 3

Don't you just love those movies that give you warm fuzzies and that you could watch once a week and never tire of? This was kind of a different post, but I knew when I rewatched this movie the other day that it was something I wanted to talk about. I hope you guys enjoyed it! < 3

AND hey, a heads up: there won't be a post next week, because... *deep breath* I'LL BE AT REALM MAKERS!! I have NO idea how it's already here, but I'm so excited! (Prayers would be appreciated- particularly for my critique appointment I'm stressing about for no reason.) 

ALSO, even if you're not attending the conference in-person or virtually, the Realm Awards ceremony is being streamed live for the public! So, if you're interested in watching, I believe it'll be available on their Facebook page. (I don't think you would need a Facebook account to watch?) You might catch a glimpse of me in my costume (which has not yet been disclosed to you ;)), or my story "The Hero of Parker City" being read off as a Flash Fiction finalist! (which still hasn't quite sunk in, I don't think? *gulps*)

ANYWAY, I hope you all are having a fantastic July so far, and I can't wait to see some of you at Realm Makers!! *CONFETTI*

What are some of your favorite comfort movies? Have you seen Ramona and Beezus? Is there a movie that you relate to deeply? And if you're a veteran Realmie- any advice for a first-time attendee? 

THE MUSIC OF ONCE UPON (meet my wip's playlist)

What happens when you forget that you switched posting days? 

You also forget to write a post, and realize you're going to have to post it last minute. THEN you don't post it at all because you've spent hours working on your blog design (*coughcough*) and are sick of looking at a screen. THEN the next week you forget AGAIN that you need to post, and end up still posting late.

Me. I did all that. xD Bear with me, folks, I don't do change well.

BUT ANYWAY. That is not the topic of this post- it's actually much more fun. (At least, I think so.)

I recently read through my current WIP, Once Upon, and wrote down pages and pages of revision notes. It was SUCH  fun time going through it and reliving the story and falling in absolute LOVE with these characters again because did I mention that I LOVE THEM?? (I don't know what it is, y'all. but these characters are my babies and I can't get over how much I love them.)

If you know me, you know that I LOVE making music playlists to go along with each of my stories. And since I'm working on Once Upon right now and this music has been on my mind, I thought I'd share a few of the songs from my playlist- as well as their meaning to the story and some of my favorite lyrics! 

"Happily Ever After" by Jordan Fisher and Angie Keilhauer

Okay, first of all, this song is seriously awesome and you need to listen to it ASAP. 

It fits this story SO well, because Once Upon (as well as the whole series it's the beginning of) is all about rediscovering the magic of fairy tales, embracing the reality that they exist, and- of course- happily ever afters. One of my favorite lines of the song just about gives me chills: "The battles, the stories, the losses and all the glories..." Because that's what Trentley and Jynnia are experiencing. They're learning firsthand about all the wonderful things that happened years ago in fairy tales. They're seeing history come to life.

This song could be the theme to this entire series. 

"Ever Ever After" by Carrie Underwood

I mean, of course. "Storybook endings, fairy tales coming true..." Again, that could be the theme song of the whole story. And then "Deep down inside, we want to believe they still do." That's Jynnia. She hears the stories of how magic may have existed in the past, how fairy tales may have actually happened, and she hopes and believes with all her heart that they actually did, because what a wonder that would be.

"Never Gonna Let You Down" by Colbie Caillat

The great thing about this story is that I can include love songs in the playlist! Most of my books don't have a romance at the forefront, so I never really need any love songs. It's been really fun putting them into this one.

While this particular song doesn't strictly have to be a love song, it works so well for Trentley and Jynnia. They're always there for each other; they complement each other and build each other up. This is such a sweet song of putting your all into a relationship and it makes me smile when I think Trentley and Jynnia. 

"Today Was A Fairytale" by Taylor Swift

Again... of COURSE this had to be on the list. Because not only is it fairy tale-themed, but it's a sweet love song that just makes me want to write allll the Trentley and Jynnia scenes. 

"Speechless" by Naomi Scott

You guys know how much I love this song from THIS post, so I was happy to be able to include it in this playlist. It works because this book is the springboard to a whole series where Trentley and Jynnia are trying to show the injustice of magic being outlawed, and doing what they can to bring it back to life. Jynnia is quite spunky and outspoken, so it's safe to say that she doesn't often go speechless; this song was a perfect addition to represent her passion for what she's fighting for and her determination to make a change. If Jynnia has a theme song, this is it.

1000 Years by KT Tunstall and Bleu

This one just about gives me chills. Again, it's a love song, so of course it's for Trentley and Jynnia. But what makes it so perfect for this story is the theme of a thousand years. No, that particular number isn't a theme in the story... but it's about fairy tales resurfacing after many years of being hidden in the past. It's about not letting their legends die because people are afraid of magic. And it's about Trentley and Jynnia's love lasting through trials and tribulations. 

So, this song is a beautiful promise that Trentley and Jynnia's love will last forever, and in 1000 years, perhaps people will be telling their story just as they do the fairy tale romances of old. 

Remember Me by Ivan Torrent

I've mentioned this song before. It's super beautiful, first of all, and I've come to love Ivan Torrent's music because it's so dreamy and epic and magical all at the same time- and it's great to write to. 

This song in particular is so perfect because the lyrics are a plea to remember the past. "Once upon a time there was a charming prince..." "Please remember it..." I mean, come on. How could this not be on this playlist? 

And that's it! There are a bunch of other songs on this playlist, but I could talk about them forever so I won't go there. xD If you haven't heard any of these songs, go listen to them!! This playlist is so fun and magical, and really gets me excited about this story. Funny thing, though... I rarely actually listen to it while I'm writing. Every now and then I will, but lately I've been needing to listen to just music when I write, because lyrics distract me. xD So, usually I'll end up listening to it when I'm driving to and from work (which results in a long, miserable day of missing my characters). 

Speaking of the story... happy Camp NaNoWriMo! July's Camp sneaks up on me every. year, and I was completely unprepared. Hehe. This month I'll be working on... you guessed it... Once Upon! It's time for revisions, so me and my pages of notes are going to become real good friends these next few weeks. (or enemies. I mean, it could go either way.)

And one more thing... *casually points up* I redid my blog header! And renamed my blog! *confetti* 

I LOVED "The Ones That Really Matter". It came straight from of my favorite books, from the mouth of one of my absolute favorite fictional characters. 

But... it was time to let it go. (Sort of.) I wanted a tagline that was a little more original, and I wanted to make my name more prominent on my blog. (which sounds super narcissistic but you guys know what I mean. xD) I came up with "Words That Really Matter" as a way to keep my original tagline alive, while also putting my own spin on it. We're all writers and/or readers here- so I don't think I need to explain to you all what I mean by words mattering. And since this blog is like a big conglomeration of things that matter to me, I think it's fitting. I hope you guys like it too! < 3

I hope you all have a most lovely July! Let me know if you're doing Camp NaNoWriMo! *cheers you on anyway*

Do you make writing playlists? Do you listen to them when you write or at other times? Any recommendations for great writing music? And who's doing Camp NaNo? Tell me about your project!

TEN OF THE SADDEST MOVIE SCENES EVER

Sad movie scenes. We hate them, we love them. They're the parts we dread when we sit down to watch

a movie, yet at the same time we have a morbid desire for a story to make us weep. 

Because apparently I have nothing better to talk about this week than heart-rending movie moments, today I'm sharing some of the scenes that I find the saddest- and maybe even make me cry. Grab your tissues, y'all, because let me tell you I almost teared up just writing parts of this. xD (not to be confused with the times I rewatched some of these scenes on YouTube, wherein I DID cry)

Spoiler alerts! Just in case any of you guys haven't seen the scenes I'll be talking about, here the movies I'm referencing: 

-Cinderella (2015)
-The Amazing Spider-man 2
-Return of the King
-Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron
-Black Beauty (1994)
-Tinker Bell and the Legend of the Neverbeast
-The Lion King
-Avengers: Infinity War
-The Voyage of the Dawn Treader
-Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith
-Up
-Bridge to Terabithia
-The Hunger Games
-Tangled

(Each movie is listed in bold before every spoiler, so feel free to just skip to the next one. Be warned, though: there are some spoilerish gifs.) 

CINDERELLA (2015) - The branch

This scene just breaks my heart. Ella runs to the door all excited because she thinks she's about to get a letter from her father who's away, but instead... she receives the news that he's died. 

But the part that gets me is when the man delivering the news gives her the gift she requested of her father back when he left- the first branch that brushed his shoulder on his travels. When she asked for this odd gift, she said she wanted it because it would mean that when it came back to her, he would be with it. 

Now, she silently mourns her father while trying to appear strong, while her stepsisters are only mourning the lace and parisols they didn't get, and just like that, her life starts to slowly crumble. 

Excuse me while I weep for Ella because :( The poor precious girl. (Honestly, the first good bit of this movie makes me want to cry because I just feel so bad for her.)

THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN 2 - The clocktower

Peter spends this whole movie trying to protect Gwen, trying to keep her out of his superhero endeavors because he doesn't want her hurt. He already feels responsible for her father's death, and he desperately wants to keep the same from happening to Gwen. Before the fight with Harry at the end, he even webs Gwen's hand to a car to keep her from following him. But she ends up following him anyway, and... well, you know what happens next. 

It's so close. It seems like Peter's web catches her just in the nick of time, but... he's a breath too late, and he can't save her. 

This is so heartbreaking to me, because Peter tried SO hard to protect Gwen. I don't recall a moment in this movie where he does anything to put her in danger; usually in a movie I feel the death would somehow have ended up being his fault, even after all his previous efforts to protect her... but he really did do his best. In the end, it was her choice to follow him, but that doesn't keep him from feeling guilty. This scene feels so realistic (other than the whole, you know, superhero thing), which adds to the sadness of it. And Peter's reaction just... *sniffles* SO sad.

RETURN OF THE KING - "...here at the end of all things"

Don't be fooled, there are MANY more than just one moment in this movie that rip my heart out. But this one... oh man. When Frodo and Sam are on the rock in the lava after destroying the Ring, and they start talking about the Shire... oh. my. goodness. I'm literally about to die typing this because IT'S JUST SO SAAAAD. These poor precious little hobbits having just been through SO much, and now they're longing for home, but they know that they won't be returning... *insert ugly cry here* And for some reason, the part that REALLY gets me here is when Sam mentions Rosie and says, "If ever I was to marry someone, it would've been her. It would've been her!"

SAM MY POOR SAD BOY. *CRIES* I LITERALLY CAN'T STAND IT. PLEASE SEND A STRETCHER BECAUSE I AM DEAD. 

SPIRIT: STALLION OF THE CIMARRON - "You Can't Take Me"

I think this was the first movie that ever made me cry. Not the first time I watched it, but now I always tear up during this part, when Spirit is being dragged away from his herd by the cowboys. The music, Spirit's desperation to escape... and then his friend the eagle swoops down looking so sad and concerned and... I just can't. IT'S SO SAD, GUYS. probably gonna go cry myself to sleep now HOW did they make me feel so much emotion over an animated horse??

Honestly, this whole movie makes me want to cry, but it's mostly just nostalgia. xD

BLACK BEAUTY (1994) - Ginger

This is another one that's pretty sad all the way through. Even the non-heartbreaking parts are a bittersweet kind of sad, as you see Black Beauty going from home to home and you just want to see him find a forever family and be happy. The part when Ginger leaves to go to a new home is sad enough.

But then you get to the scene when Black Beauty sees Ginger in the packed city, and she's overworked and sad and mistreated and nothing but a shell of the vibrant friend he used to know. Again, I don't know how they had any business making me feel this way over a horse, but my GOODNESS. Seeing his old friend in her condition, and remembering how she used to be... and then later seeing her body... it's just so awful.

(listen, I was doing okay and then I remembered the part at the end of the movie when Black Beauty is reminiscing, and goes back to the golden days when he and Ginger and Merrylegs were together and happy and life was good... actual tears in my eyes. not okay.)

TINKER BELL AND THE LEGEND OF THE NEVERBEAST - Gruff's goodbye

I never thought I'd put a Tinker Bell movie on a list like this... but the end of this movie, where Fawn and the fairies are getting the Neverbeast ready for his thousand-year sleep... my goodness. I do believe I just about teared up when I watched it. It was so bittersweet, seeing all the fairies tenderly tucking Gruff in, so to speak, knowing that they would never see him again. It honestly felt like saying goodbye to a pet who has died, and since I've been through that multiple times, perhaps that's why it struck my heart so deeply.

THE LION KING - The stampede

Do I even need to explain? 

I'm pretty sure this movie caused trauma in many children's movie-watching experience back the in the day. I couldn't NOT include it on this list. Funnily enough, I don't really cry during THIS scene (though I cry for like half of the rest of the movie xD)... but the rest of the parts that make me emotional are BECAUSE of this scene. When Simba sings "I Just Can't Wait to be King", it saddens me because he doesn't realize what he's saying- to be king he has to lose his father- and because he doesn't realize that he'll be losing his father much sooner than he ever thought he would. 

(This movie is just so beautiful. It literally gets better every time I watch it.)

INFINITY WAR - The dusting

Again... do I really have to explain? 

I could really bunch this scene into the first part of Endgame, because it all just tore me up. When it was revealed that five years had passed... O_O Excuse me, but you are not allowed to play with my heart like this. 

THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA- THE VOYAGE OF THE DAWN TREADER - Coming home

Prince Caspian almost made this list, too. (the song along makes it worthy my goodness) But for me, the ending of Dawn Treader edges out a bit in the way of sadness. Because even though we've already been through it once with Peter and Susan leaving Narnia for good... Lucy and Edmund having to say goodbye is so much worse. The goodbye scene is heartbreaking- leaving Reepicheep, and Caspian, and Aslan. But then when they're back in their room, and the water is all gone, and the painting is still... and you see the sad, sad looks on their faces... *deep breath* It's just... so sad. Seeing Peter and Susan have to leave is terrible (especially knowing what happens with Susan later), but there's just something so wrong about knowing that Lucy can't go back. 

The fact that this was the last movie just makes this worse. Even if they make more movies later, it will just never be the same. (and yes I will forever be bitter about this)

STAR WARS REVENGE OF THE SITH - Order 66

*sniffles*

This whole MOVIE could be on this list. Watching Obi-Wan and Anakin's friendship slowly fall apart- seeing Anakin fall completely apart while Padme helplessly watches- it's just so heartbreaking. But I had to pick one specific moment to go on this list, and I think Order 66 is a big one. When Obi-Wan and Commander Cody are talking like friends, and then Obi-Wan leaves and the Empereror initiates Order 66... and then everything turns. Everything's downhill from there. The clone troopers that were allies literally seconds ago are suddenly enemies, and the Jedi are about to be vanquished. Obi-Wan barely escapes in time, and you know he'll never be the same after that. 

HONORABLE MENTIONS

These honorable mentions aren't necessarily any less sad. But for me, personally, they maybe just didn't have quite the same effect as some of the others on the list, or I haven't seen them as much as others so I haven't had my heart ripped out by them quite as many times. Enjoy. xD

UP - Ellie

No explanation necessary. Every Pixar fan in the world knows how heartbreaking this is. 

BRIDGE TO TERABITHIA - Leslie

I've only seen this movie once, but I remember how truly heartbreaking this death was. The whole movie was so much different from what I expected it to be, and I certainly didn't expect it to end the way it did. 

TANGLED - "You were my new dream"

OKAY TANGLED BEING AN HONORABLE MENTION ON ANY LIST SEEMS WRONG TO ME, I KNOW. BUT I guess simply because we know that Flynn actually survives, this part doesn't hit QUITE as hard as it could have. BUT IT STILL HITS PLENTY HARD, DON'T MISUNDERSTAND ME. The "You were my new dream"?? TEARS. UGH. 

THE HUNGER GAMES - Rue

There are so many deaths in The Hunger Games, and it seems obvious that Rue's would be on a list of sad scenes. I think what makes it so sad is the way it affects Katniss. She knows how awful the Hunger Games are; she knows how tragic it is that twelve-year-old CHILDREN are slaughtered every year for the Capitol's entertainment. But what makes this scene so heartbreaking is that it's like it really hits home for Katniss. She's right there, in the middle of it; she sees an innocent young girl murdered in cold blood right before her eyes. She realizes it could have been her sister. And here she is, out here in the wilderness, trying to protect her family, and she feels so helpless and vulnerable. *hugs my poor Katniss*

RETURN OF THE KING - The Grey Havens

BY NO MEANS. BY NOOO MEANS is this an honorable mention because it's any less sad than literally ANYTHING else on this list. When Frodo leaves the Shire (leaves SAM NOO) to go the Grey Havens... and Into the West starts playing... I... I... I... 

-please hold while emily reloads-

Yeah. This scene is plenty sad enough. I only put it on the honorable mentions for the sake of not having two scenes from the same movie on the official list. xD 

Well, guys, have I got you sufficiently depressed yet? Because I sort of feel that way, after coming up with all these scenes and then writing a post about it. xD Also, the number of times I used the word "heartbreaking" in this post is ridiculous and I'm sorry. Ehehe.

ALSO, you've probably noticed- It's Thursday! I mean, obviously. BUT I'm actually going to be posting on Thursdays from now on, instead of Saturdays. I've been posting on Saturdays for a while now, but I really prefer posting in the morning, and most of the time I end up procrastinating and getting the post up either Saturday evening or Sunday morning. I finally realized, hey, this isn't working, so I'm changing it up. xD (I started out on this blog posting on Thursdays, and honestly it feels a bit like coming home.)

You might also have noticed that my URL changed! Keep an eye for some more changes around here! Nothing huge, but I'm excited about them!

So, which of these scenes do you think was the saddest? What sad movie scenes would you add to the list? (give a spoiler warning in your comment, please xD) 

THE NEVER HAVE I EVER TAG // writer's edition

Greetings, friends! Everyone's writerly life looks a little different, right? We all have different habits, have accomplished different things, and possess a number of other writerly quirks. Well, today I'm talking about alll that in this tag that has about 5 layers of dust on it because the wonderful Christine tagged me for it literally a year ago and I'm just now doing it. Ehehe. 

BUT fear not, because the tag shall no longer lie as a dead soul lost to mankind. I present to you: the Never Have I Ever tag- Writer's Edition! 

(in which I expose myself. ooh, juicy.)

-Link to and thank the blogger who tagged you! (Thank you, Christine!! ♥)

-Include the graphic somewhere in your post (or make your own!)

-Answer the questions truthfully and honestly. 

-Tag three bloggers. (*crickets*)

Here is the original post, if you want to check that out! 

NEVER HAVE I EVER…

. . . started a novel that I did not finish.

LOL. L.O.L. Y'all. I only started actually FINISHING my novels a couple years ago. xD I wrote and finished books back when I was younger, but I don't count those, sooo YES. I absolutely HAVE started a novel that I did not finish. (and continue to do so on a regular basis.)

. . . written a story completely by hand.

If we're talking novels, no, I haven't! Or at least not that I can remember. When I was a kid I used to write by hand quite a lot, but I'm not sure I ever really wrote a whole book that way. (And if I did, it certainly wasn't anywhere NEAR a full-length book.) I definitely have written many short stories by hand, though!

. . . changed tenses midway through a story.

Before a couple of years ago, I definitely didn't do this, because I always wrote in past tense. I still write my novels in past tense, but since I do write flash fiction in present tense now, I would totally believe that I may have slipped tenses. Not intentionally, though, because I always know what tense I want to be in when I start based on the type of project I'm writing. 

. . . not researched anything before starting a story.

Research? What is research?

I write fantasy, y'all. I make up worlds and then dive in head first. Research is the last thing on my mind when I start a story. xD

. . . changed my protagonist’s name halfway through a draft.

Ooh, I'm honestly not sure! I know I changed a protagonist's name before, but I don't think I'd started writing the story yet. I think there's only one other novel that has characters whose names I've changed, but that was after years of working on it.

. . . written a story in a month or less.

Surprisingly, no! I've done NaNo several times now and won three times, but I've never finished the book in that month. It's on my writerly bucket list!

. . . fallen asleep while writing.

More accurately, fallen asleep while procrastinating writing. xD I don't think I've ever drifted off literally while I'm typing, but I definitely have fallen asleep in bed with my laptop open. I was probably watching YouTube or doing something else random, but I was intending to write, at least. xD 

. . . corrected someone’s grammar irl / online.

Oh, yeah. DEFINITELY. ALL the time. To the point where it makes my family mad. (Which... I don't really understand? Just trying to help you out here, wouldn't want you going out into the world and embarrassing yourself with bad grammar.) Do I keep doing it? Yes. Fight me. 

I've never done it online, though. xD

. . . yelled in all caps at myself in the middle of a novel.

HAHA. Yes. xD I couldn't count how many times I've inserted a good "WHAT THE HECK IS SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN HERE" or "I HAVE NO IDEA WHO THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT LOL" (both fabricated for the sake of this question, but their nature is very accurate xD). To be fair, I think I do this more in my mess of a notes document than I do in my novels, but still. 

. . . used “I’m writing” as an excuse.

Honestly, I don't think I have! This is probably a sign that I should take my writing time a little more seriously. xD

. . . killed a character who was based on someone I know in real life.

Ha. No. But there's still time. >:)

. . . used pop culture references in a story.

*dies inside*

So, let me tell you a story. My first novel (to speak of) was a portal fantasy about a bunch of a teenagers, one of which I pictured as Peter Pevensie from the Narnia movies. In the first scene (prepare yourselves, this is the most epic opening of a fantasy story ever) they were all sitting around eating popcorn and watching... you guessed it... The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe. 

Genius, I know.

But I said I wasn't counting my old stories, so forget about that. xD I don't really have many opportunities to reference pop culture, since I write mostly fantasy. If I ever did have the opportunity, though, you can bet I'd be taking it.

. . . written between the hours of 1am and 6am.

Yes! I'm not 100% sure if I've ever written after 1AM, because as much as I'd like to stay up through the wee hours of the night during NaNoWriMo, my body simply won't let me do it. #iamgettingold BUT I do know that I've gotten up really early and written at like 5:30. 

. . . drank an entire pot of coffee while writing.

Surprisingly, no. xD I usually make it through one cup and then realize I've just been procrastinating writing to sit there and chug the coffee, so there's no way I could make it through the whole pot and actually get writing done.

. . . written down dreams to use in potential novels.

I don't think I have! Which is really weird, because I have crazy dreams AND I draw inspiration from the strangest places. But oddly enough, the two haven't crossed over yet!

. . . published an unedited story on the internet / Wattpad / blog.

Unedited?? What do you think I am, some kind of monster??

I mean, yeah, the Trentley and Jynnia stories I post on here from time to time are less polished than stories I would submit anywhere to be published. But they're still at least roughly edited. xD

. . . procrastinated homework because I wanted to write.

I mean... yeah. Mainly during NaNoWriMo last year, probably, because the rest of the time I was too drowned in homework to do much of anything. But I did manage to win NaNo, so it's inevitable that I must have procrastinated homework at least once. 

. . . typed so long that my wrists hurt.

I can't think of a specific occurrence, but I'm pretty sure this has happened, yes. Not very often though, thankfully!

. . . spilled a drink on my laptop while writing.

Oh man. Again, I don't remember a time when I did this, but I KNOW I have. (Honestly, probably more taking bookstagram photos than writing. xD)

. . . forgotten to save my work / draft.

I think I've done this before, but not recent enough to remember, because now you can bet I save my writing every 4.5 seconds. I do remember once years ago when I somehow deleted my whole book and didn't know there was a way to undo it, so I just accepted my fate and rewrote the whole thing. xD (Don't worry, though, it wasn't a great loss.)

. . . finished a novel.

I have! Yay! Only up to the second draft, though. Definitely not 100%!

. . . laughed like an evil villain while writing a scene.

Lol. This is almost certainly true.

. . . cried while writing a scene.

I actually think that I have yet to make myself cry with my writing! I may have almost teared up before, but I haven't actually cried yet. 

. . . created maps of my fictional worlds.

I made a map for one of my fantasy worlds years ago, which was okay in itself, but I drew out the characters' journey and they literally went in a straight line over the whole map. xD

. . . researched something shady for a novel.

Oh, yeah. Mostly about injuries, I think? Gotta know how much I can wound a character before they can't possibly be alive anymore, right? 

And there you go- all the details about me and my writerly self that you'll ever need to know. Note to self: Still need to make myself cry with my writing. Or maybe I'm just a heartless creature who will torture my characters all day long but never feel anything from it. *shrugs*

I'm not going to tag anyone because I always find it unnecessarily stressful xD So, if you want to do this tag, consider yourself invited! I'd love to read about all your strange writerly habits. Let us be strange together.

So, how many of these do we have in common? What's the shadiest thing you've researched for your writing? And I wanna know who's made themselves cry with their stories, because I feel like I'm in the minority here. xD

IT'S YOUR STORY // how similar stories still have their own impact

Last week I told y'all that I recently watched/read The Hunger Games for the first time, and I shared all the uncanny similarities I noticed between them and the Out of Time series . In case you missed my post last week: 

- MC Girl goes to Scary Thing and has to figure out how to survive

-Girl's journey is broadcast across the country

-Potential love interest in Scary Place with her

-But other guy who is also possible love interest is back home watching her journey unfold

-Attacked by wolves

-Somebody loses a limb (book only, in THG's case)

-There's a little sidekick girl

-MC comes back at the end triumphant and super famous

(there were things throughout all three books of each trilogy, but the most similarities were in the first books.)

Crazy, huh? When I was watching the first THG movie, I was just floored by all the little details and bigger elements alike that the two books had in common. And these were all besides the obvious fact that they're both YA dystopians, too. 

So, yeah, the two books/series are ridiculously similar in some ways, almost enough that it could have been on purpose. But you know what struck me about this?

Both stories are still vastly different.

Even with so many aspects that these books shared, did I feel like I was experiencing the same story when I was watching THG? Not at all. Sure, it's a dystopian about a teenage girl rising above the odds to survive and eventually change her world. Sure, there were scary similarities. But still, A Time to Die was in no way a repeat of The Hunger Games! 

So, what does this mean, exactly? What point am I making? 

Even though two stories may be similar, they are still different stories written by different people. And because of that, they each matter in their own ways. They will hit the hearts of readers in different ways. They will do different things. Though the overall idea of the stories might be the same, and though they might share a crazy amount of similarities, they bring different things to the table. 

Writer, if you're worrying about your story being too similar to someone else's- stop. Especially if you're in the early stages of writing it. Chances are, it's not too similar to really matter. And even if it has as many similarities as ATTD and THG, or even more... you don't need to worry about that right now. 

Someday you might need to. Maybe when you're in the publishing process and your editor says that X concept needs to be tweaked because it's too close to something in a story that's already famous. But for right now, just write your story. Maybe that element that will need to change later is necessary right now to make your story what it will eventually become. Or maybe it will stay exactly the same and will forever bear a parallel to another well-established story. That's okay. That other story is not yours, and your story has something the other one doesn't. 

(obviously there are exception. if you're planning on naming your character katniss... I can tell you right now that's not going to work out. xD)

And I think that goes for similarities between your own stories, too. Everyone always talks about elements and tropes they tend to weave into their books, and... my characters are always in hiding, from either the villain or the authorities. xD I don't know why. It's certainly not intentional. But for whatever reason, my cast is always either outrunning whatever is that storyworld-equivalent of the cops, or hiding from the villain. I've wondered before if that's a problem- surely it's something people would notice one day if all my stories are published and out in the world- but I don't need to worry about that. Maybe eventually I'll need to rethink it, maybe I won't. But even if I didn't change them at all, they are all still very different stories. 

So, if you're discouraged because you don't think your story is original enough, or you think it's too similar to a famous movie or book- take heart. Keep writing. Whatever your story is meant to be, it will become that if you don't give up on it. Imagine if Nadine Brandes had noticed all the similarities between her story and The Hunger Games, and given up on writing it. A lot of people's lives would be different, because her books have impacted SO many lives in ways The Hunger Games hasn't. (And the other way around!) 

Write that story, friend. It's your story. The world needs it. And only you can write it the way you do. ♥

I MAKE MY RETURN // what I've been up to on hiatus!

Hiii everyone! I'm officially back from hiatus! *makes grand entrance*

So, I was gone a little longer than I said I would be. I only planned to be away for the month of April. Then the first Saturday in May came along and I realized I hadn't written my blog post. xD SO, I decided then and there to go ahead and extend my break a couple more weeks. That way I could finish out the semester with minimal stress. 

And I'm glad I did! I'm so thankful that these last few weeks of school have been (mostly) relaxed and easy... but also SUPER thankful they're over. ;) 

Since I've been gone for a little while, I thought I'd share some of what I've been up to these past couples months! (going back to March, since I didn't do a monthly recap for it) So, buckle in for longwinded randomness. xD (it's been a while, guys. I've got to catch up.)

So many great books, guys!! 

I finally read the Ravenwood Saga by Morgan Busse! I've been dying to read these for a while, especially since I received a signed set this past Christmas. And what a delightful adventure they were! Such beautiful fantasy stories with one of my favorite representations of the Light that I've ever seen. 

I finally got around to reading the third Havok anthology, Bingeworthy! These anthologies must just keep getting better, because I think I enjoy each one a little bit more! 

I read The Hunger Games! More on that later, though, because I only read the books after I watched the movies and I have Things to Say.

I'm also currently in the middle of a few books that I'm really enjoying! I'm reading Hidden Current by Sharon Hinck, an ARC of Shadow by Kara Swanson, and the Warriors Against the Storm anthology. I don't even know what I'm doing with all these books. Don't ask. xD 

Oh, speaking of books and not knowing what to do with them. I bought... an exorbitant amount of books on hiatus. Just take a peek up at the photo for this blog post and... yeah. xD That's not even all of them. #oops

I won Camp NaNoWriMo! 

And my experience was quite predictably Emily-like. Meaning, I went (sort of) strong for a little while, then dropped off partway through the month, then got to the last week (or, like, two days in this case) and panic-finished. But hey, it worked. xD

Not only did I reach my Camp goal of editing 25k, but I also finished my second draft!! Roots to Claim has now been very roughly edited, and my next step is another read-through with some major planning and figuring out what needs to change because let me tell you, there is a LOT. In fact, I started wondering during Camp if maybe this needed to be a duology. *facepalm* I'm pretty sure it wouldn't need to go further than that (though I DO love trilogies...), but I think there might just be too much I'm wanting to unpack to just be one story. This will hopefully be determined when I go through it a third time and take notes of what needs to be done. 

Something writerly I did that was very exciting but also extremely nervewracking was: I sent the first ten pages of Once Upon (Trentley and Jynnia's story!) off for my paid critique at Realm Makers! I'm looking forward to it, but also am lowkey panicking about having to sit down for thirty minutes with somebody and talk about my story. xD (That's every writer's dream AND worst nightmare, am I wrong??) Before sending them, I went back through and touched them up a bit, and HELLO. I am still VERY MUCH IN LOVE WITH TRENTLEY AND JYNNIA AND I ADORE THEM AND WANT TO ADOPT THEM. I'm planning on getting back to their story over the summer, and I am so excited because I love it so much. (I had my sister read over the beginning, which she'd never read before, and she said she already wants to see Trentley and Jynnia married. So, y'know. I'm doing something right.)

Aaand also related to writing, something huge happened in April, which was that the Realm Awards finalists were announced and I saw my name on the list. But I've already done no small amount of shrieking about that here, so if you're interested in me shrieking and haven't read it yet, go read that. xD

March 18- my birthday! I turned 23, with no shortage of sadness about aging out of my Taylor Swift year. Yes, I'm still sad about it. xD 

I posted a video on my YouTube channel!

We randomly got some snow? Like, 4 inchs?? On April 20th?? What even?? It only lasted a day and it didn't even get that cold, but let me tell you I was BAMBOOZLED. I THOUGHT THIS WAS SPRING. (y'all know I LOVE me some snow but. come on. xD)

I slipped on my stairs and landed like an anvil and I'm 98% sure I bruised my tailbone. TMI? I don't care. Y'all gotta suffer with me. xD (did you know it can take up to 4 weeks for a bruised tailbone to heal? eheheh. still feeling it not gonna lie.)

One day when I was driving home, I saw a coyote run across my driveway! Where I live, we hear coyotes howling some nights, but we haven't actually seen one since we moved in close to twenty years ago. So, yeah, I was pretty surprised when one ran out in front of my car and fled across our field. xD

There was a Starbucks opened near me!! Before this past week, I'd literally had Starbucks once in my life, in a mall, and let me tell you I was EXCITED for this. I have a goal to try everything on the menu. (which isn't going so great since I went there yesterday and they were out of cake pops. not cool, dude.) 

I finished my second semester of college! So VERY glad to be done with that, although honestly this semester wasn't too bad. Still, I'm very happy to have the whole summer off. 

I watched the 2003 Peter Pan movie for the first! It was so fun! :D Very much would like to go on an adventure to Neverland now. 

The cuties!!

And speaking of watching things for the first time...

-PLEASE HOLD FOR THIS BRIEF HUNGER GAMES INTERMISSION-

(lol don't hold your breath on that "brief" thing)

SO. Like I mentioned, I watched The Hunger Games for the first time! This was SO overdue, as I've been wanting to watch these movies FOREVER. I finally watched them all with my brother (who had already seen them), and whew. What a journey. Soon after, I read the books for the first time, too, which was good because I was sad to be done with the movies and I missed all the characters. Then I finished the books and got major book hangover. xD

*Peeta throws burnt bread to Katniss* 

Me: "He's a bad baker. He can only make pita bread."

Also, can we just pause to talk about all the uncanny similarities between THG and the Out of Time series?! Because I thought of a bunch after the first movie it kind of blew my mind. There were a few later on, too (was I reaching for them at that point? yes). This is all BESIDES just the general dystopian vibes. Allow me to share: (beware, spoilers for both trilogies ahead)

Book 1: 

- MC Girl goes to Scary Thing and has to figure out how to survive

-Girl's journey is broadcast across the country

-Potential love interest in Scary Place with her

-But other guy who is also possible love interest is back home watching her journey unfold

-Attacked by wolves

-Somebody loses a limb (book only, in THG's case)

-There's a little sidekick girl

-MC comes back at the end triumphant and super famous

Book 2:

-There's snow 

-I SAW A BOWL OF POTATOES IN CATCHING FIRE (look, I told you I was reaching)

-A group of people work together to survive in the wilderness

-HER HOMETOWN IS LITERALLY BLOWN UP. That was the real kicker. UNITY VILLAGE. DISTRICT 12. GONE.

Book 3:

-There's an underground community

-In the Mockingjay movie, THEY LITERALLY USE THE TERM "RADICALS" for the rebels

-Scary Thing that Girl faced in Book 1 is done away with

??? Anybody else seeing this??? Because I was astounded. xD

And how about another mind-blowing revelation- PEETA MELLARK SHOULD HAVE BEEN OUR MASCOT IN 2020. Why? Allow me to explain. 

-We felt like we were living in a YA dystopian

-Buying ramen noodles and toilet paper was like making a run for the Cornucopia

-And everyone learned how to bake bread??? And that's what everyone did all year??? THEREFORE. PEETA MELLARK 2020. TELL ME I'M WRONG. YOU CAN'T, BECAUSE I'M A GENIUS. 

The precious bread boy < 3

Aaand I think that's about all I've been up to lately! It's been quite a lovely break, but I missed posting and I'm glad to be back now! I'm working on my plans for this summer (mostly writing-related), and I can't wait to read ALLL the books.

I'm also planning to get back to making videos on my YouTube channel, so look for that as well! Until next week! ♥ 

HIII GUYS! What have you all been up to? Any big plans for the summer? And tell me I'm not the only one who sees the Hunger Games/Out of Time thing, because I'm still in awe. xD